Journal Entry: Celeste Monette Blair-10/06/2024-ON THE TIMELINE TOWARDS OUR GOALS

Journal Entry

ON THE TIMELINE TOWARDS OUR GOALS

We are all at a different place on the timeline towards reaching our goals.
At first, we just have dreams; these big ideas that we talk about but aren’t always exactly on the road towards our goals, we have some work to do on ourselves first.

Self Esteem, Self Worth and Self Respect are all crucial building blocks along that road, no matter what your individual road looks like. These words are slightly different, with similar meaning but did you know that these building blocks are the foundation of success?

Too little self- esteem can leave people feeling defeated or depressed. It can also lead people to make bad choices, fall into destructive relationships, or fail to live up to their full potential.
Too much self-esteem, as exhibited in narcissistic personality disorder, can certainly be off- putting to others and can even damage personal relationships.

Self-esteem levels at the extreme high and low and of the spectrum can be harmful, so ideally, it’s best to strike a balance somewhere in the middle.

There is a formula that you can use in your life that will lead you to your best, organic, self esteem, beautiful balance.
Living a healthy, well balanced life, where you are mindful of fostering the spokes found on the 8 dimensions of wellness:
physical, emotional, spiritual, community, occupational, intellectual, social, and financial; is the most natural way to achieve true self esteem. It really boils down to loving yourself enough to spend each day, investing your time towards the best balance of your self.

You will find, a realistic and positive view of yourself will grow when you set out to fill your days with the spokes of the wheel.

But what exactly is self esteem? Where does it come from and what influence does it really have on our lives?

( at this point in a workshop, BRAINSTORM ON THE BOARD )

” WHAT IS SELF ESTEEM?” ex. VALUE, A PERSONALITY TRAIT, STABLE, ENDURING, YOU APPRECIATE YOURSELF, SELF LOVE

In psychology, the term self-esteem is used to describe a person’s overall sense of self-worth or personal value. In other words, how much you appreciate and like yourself.

Signs of Low Self- Esteem: ” what does this look like?”

You may need to work on how you perceive yourself if you exhibit any of these signs of poor self-esteem;
check you schedule and be truthful as to whether or not you are actively pursuing a balanced lifestyle.

Negative outlook

Lack of confidence

Inability to express your needs

Focus on your weaknesses

Feelings of shame, depression, or anxiety

Belief that others are better than you

Trouble accepting positive feedback

Fear of failure

Signs of Healthy Self Esteem: ” how do you identify, like, what does it look like? “

You probably have a good sense of who you are if you exhibit the following signs:

Confidence

Ability to say no

Positive outlook

Ability to see overall strengths and weaknesses and accept them

Negative experiences don’t impact overall perspective

You have established healthy boundaries, you’re resilient and able to bounce back.

What if I said, SELF ESTEEM IS HOW MUCH YOU BELIEVE IN YOURSELF?

More importantly, we get back to the formula.
If you spend an hour a day, on the track, or doing a HIIT routine: whatever it is where you are setting small goals for your physical self and reaching them daily, your will begin to build trust within yourself.

( brainstorm again on the board )

WHY IS SELF ESTEEM IMPORTANT?

-especially in relationships-
what does it look like?
how do we allow others to treat us?
talk to us?
touch us?

Healthy boundaries and self esteem are intertwined.

Self-esteem can play a significant role in your motivation and success throughout your life. Low self-esteem may hold you back form succeeding at school or work because you don’t believe yourself to be capable of success.

For a person who is on parole or probation, this can cripple you and may even be the cause for your to circle endlessly in and out of toxic relationships.

So doesn’t it make sense that having a healthy self-esteem can help you achieve because you navigate life with a positive assertive attitude and believe you can accomplish your goals.

By beginning here, with small achievable goals, the next phase of our lives will be more successful.

As you might imagine there are different factors that can influence self-esteem. Genetic factors that help shape overall personality can play a role, but it is often our experiences that come from the basis for overall self esteem. Those who consistently receive overly critical or negative assessments from caregivers, family members and friends, for example, will likely experience problems with low self-esteem.

Let me explain the basic science to you to help you understand how negative words can influence you:

Let’s say one summer day, in 1977, my dad tells me I am worthless, to get the hell out of his house, regardless if he means it or not, regardless if he let’s me back in later- I have now, buried a feeling in my little heart on that day.

hurt
embarrassment
self doubt
loneliness insecurity
sadness
anger
hatred

Now time goes by, and all this stuff is buried there. My heart is heavy. At some point, I am dragging it all around.
Baggage.

Years go by, and I think I am over it. I can’t see it, I’ve pushed those feelings out of my mind and buried them under a heap really deep, in my heart.

Then I meet someone, or land a job somewhere, form a friendship, whatever.
And it happens, this trigger like, ” get out ” or ” I don’t want to be with you anymore” or ” you’re fired”

and that thought grabs a shovel and digs deep into your heart and pulls it all out. All your pain and insecurity-
your buried feelings connect to the current thought and an emotion is born.

Sometimes there is an actual explosion.
For sure there is a ripple effect.
You may lose your cool, at best.

This is the reason that it is imperative to follow the formula of the 8 dimensions of wellness.
In the space where your physical spoke overlaps with your spiritual spoke, there is a quite place where,
after a good workout, you can sit and clear your mind.

Find the love you have for yourself and one by one, pick the feelings out of your heart and hold them up to the light and make peace with them.