As you may know, I recently received a commutation of sentence.
Number 7 of the petition is titled, REASONS FOR SEEKING CLEMENCY, here is how I answered the question:
I know that I made terrible, foolish, unlawful mistakes but in my life, I was simply doing my best to numb my pain after a divorce. My life spiraled out of control. I had no boundaries or coping skills; these are only things I have learned to incorporate into my life while here in Federal Prison. When I first got here, I realized there was something very wrong with my thought process. I couldn’t believe I allowed myself to fall into the throws of addiction over a divorce. Nothing in life or
in drug addiction is ever really that simple. When I found out that RDAP ( The Residential Drug Abuse Program ) was a cognitive program that lasted 9 months, I bugged the Administrator at Hazelton to let me in although a person in Federal Prison goes to RDAP in the final stages of their prison sentence. i had no idea how much I needed the program- how traumatized , damaged and broken I really was. I embraced the program fully. I lived in the RDAP community for 6 or more months before beginning. I completed the 9 month program and went on to be a mentor in the program for several more months. I now have healthy boundaries, coping skills and while my thoughts may not always be rational, I have the tools to reason them out. I have a beautiful relationships with so many family members. They love me so much, no one had any idea that I had relapsed; which leads me to something else RDAP taught me; the importance of honesty and having a safety net. I had been sober, well I had not been using illegal drugs for many years, I didn’t communicate with people using drugs and I was sort of sheltered. Yet when I came upon a difficult life situation, I was blind sided and honestly I believe that my pride kept me from being honest about my situation. This was such an epiphany to me that I started teaching and talking honestly and openly to the younger girls here, in the hopes that my past mistakes could perhaps help them in their future success.
Today, I work for the Captain. I have a job that I love. I am the only landscape orderly and I tend to the flowers. I wake up every day with a glad and grateful heart because my life is rich with a freedom that I didn’t have in the two years prior to my arrest.
I am intelligent, gentle and kind. I have an enormous and wonderful support system who all want me home. I have the most beautiful mother in the entire world and I would give anything to spend the next years by her side. I pray you hear my
words and my heart, I’m an addict but now have the coping skills in place for a successful future. Please grant me clemency so that I can show myself first and foremost, and then others, that I can be a success story. Thank you for your time.
