Sunday at Aliceville the end of 2024
I love working on Sunday in the garden, there is no one else around to disturb the time I have with the plants; the way they connect the the natural earth to my soul sparks creativity; even in the midst of their own disaster. Caring for the plants is painful sometimes, it hurt my heart to have to dig into the branches but so much love was exchanged. Like when a friend removes a splinter that you can’t quite get to.
Out of 5 of the, ” JAZZ HANDS”, I was only able to save one from having to be stripped to the core. The shrubs look so different now, smoothed down to the barest branches, exposing the black spots that threaten survival. We don’t have neem or anything else that I need so I will make a past of foot powder and frankincense and rub it in the illness that is too deep to be cut out. I haven’t research how it may effect the rose bushes that share the space, but I plan to finish stripping out the the corrupts dirt, leaves and mulch in the bed to the liner dirt, no matter what. We are talking about only a space the size of an small garage floor.
I put on the play list called HIGH ENERGY COOL. Songs of freedom kept coming along.
I am reminded of this lake that I used to dive in, have you ever gone under in a man- made lake where trees once towered above ground but now they look like ghosts ; white trunks swaying underwater? There is a place like, a white swaying ghost forest, mad-made lake on the Texas/Oklahoma border. Seemed like some mystical, netherworld-place when you dove down. It’s like being in a dream.
That is the place and time I was thinking of all day, while carefully removing all the branches from the shrubs. The illness is one that grows in the joints which makes it almost imperative to cut everything down below the first joint on all the branches, in the main 3 or 4, I painstakingly etched out the crevice’s of the main intersections.
There was so much therapy paying careful attention to the dark spots and smoothing out the branches.
I find I spend quite a bit of my time engaged in things that I control, that I have to delve my whole self into, when I walk out into the day room, everyone seems to be just dizzying around.
So many times in that garden, I have thought this too, must be a dream. I am so amazed by the many unexpected things I find here, truths, MOMENTS in my life that are peace filled in the midst of chaos.
I found so much gratitude, as I talked the plants through the horrid surgery; gratitude for my life and the transformation I have found in my heart, the manner in which I have been able to do my time, for the upcoming DOULA PROGRAM, for the breeze.
Some time ago I began mulling over the idea of TRANSLATEBLE SKILLS WORKSHOPS. I think the world is changing so rapidly, our methods of getting our tax payers the best ROI- how we heard the folks who have been found guilty in America, especially folks with non violent crimes – through this “system”, the re-entry process that is supposed to begin the first day of incarceration.
It’s time to take a step back and begin to really change the way we send folks out to the communities, this can no longer be a conversation they are having at the DOJ tables, it’s criminal to continue on this way.
In the 1980’s , many of us sold drugs at a time when that was the most convenient, easy to get funded “start up”.
Now, with a similar skill set, there are opportunities that can serve us well, if channeled responsibly.
Single mothers who needed a way to live the way the tv and magazines were telling them they must, in order to be attractive, thin and able to work two or three jobs and find a sitter.
Those go-getter women are grandmothers now, many in Federal Prison for non- violent crimes, some 100,00 or more, have children out there who could really see a difference in the length of their dollar, if they had a baby sitter. Others have parents out there, often times parents who have taken care of them for so many years, in this inflated- prison economy.
They need someone to care for them.
There are so many easy ways to connect the women here to the gaps needed out there.
When I first came here, the business women in me, was appalled at how the BOP is run. It would be bankrupt if it was a business, but no, it’s the burden of the tax payers- free money is how many of the folks here, officers and prisoners alike- view things.
It’s literally criminal for the DOJ and the BOP to continue, year after 50 years of MASS INCARCERATION in America, to continue to churn out people who have only grown more bitter, disenfranchised and cut off from society- tossing them back out with PTSD and no hope for a future, having learned only not to trust anyone at all.
Their families left to figure it all out.
It’s bad business, it’s irresponsible. For 30k- 56k a year to house me, I should be leaving here in good shape with a solid plan.
So as not to add insult to injury, let us begin to look at things from a real- time perspective.
Focus on the ROI of each person, each prisoner.
One of the reasons that I formed the PEER SUCCESS MENTOR PROGRAM , here at Aliceville, was because too many times, women were leaving, sharing with me that they had no idea what the next phase of their lives look like.
We live in a fast, cliff note sort of world where the most successful folks are those who brand themselves, a world of pop up stores and here, we can do some things that are on that same vibe- SHORT, TRANSLATABLE SKILLS WORKSHOPS.
Translatable skills workshops are going to be so easy to pull off but it’s going to take the co-operation of the bosses here- picture this:
We have Peer Success Mentors in every department here- so let’s say I submit a proposal and am granted permission to
do a project on the yard, in the garden in the springtime; the participants ( maybe 6-10 ) would come out for a 2-4 day project where I have them help me lay a bed with liner, plant it and mulch it. Bam, give them a certificate detailing what they did.
Or better yet, this cutting out of the fungus. If we really wanted to get creative, the workshop would begin in the garden; the women would learn how to deal with the issue, ” hands on ” and then part two would be the writing workshop:
My Tia Favorita, Lena, contributed these questions.
1) Who have been the dirt dobbers of your life?
For me, it’s been myself and anyone else who has kept me from breathing, blossoming.
2) What else has infected you from the outside? In a lively circle, I would share this:
My pineal gland comes to mind, just as one would put a wall around their heart, I find I must keep a strong film over the parts of me that are so sensitive, lest I become infected by all the toxicity around me. Other people and the lack of a positive schedule, self love and self care… all can infect you from the outside.
3) How do you acknowledge and love the darkest parts of yourself?
I think this is one of the reasons we have, ” humor”.
Just as I am taking the the time to clear away the debris, trim out the entire bush, at just the right time.
In my own heart, a place where either love or hatred flows over, I must always be mindful to clean out the muck.
4) What is it like to just sit with the infection and talk to it?
Isn’t that what so many people do, as they go about their day, claiming their illness allowing the sickness to thrive rather than get to the source, the formula for wellness?
5) Why must I keep digging to get to the root? What might happen if I get there?
In the garden, I am doing my best to get it all out, go deep enough to rough it out, but the truth is, I can still see the dark spots in the branches so I know I must focus on the soil and the surrounding areas. A plant with rotted roots will never thrive as well. On of the beauties of nature is that we can control the health of a root by the soil and other influences. Roots are resilient and can be restored to balance enough to thrive once again.
We are much the same. I have found that I can thrive under toxic conditions long enough to escape: meaning I find my self in a situation where I must take a deep breath, assess the damage, scrape together what knowledge I have gained and runnnnn. No, seriously, this has been the story in more than one situation, but generally, we have to swiftly cut out the illness and correct our environment, the most important one is the one we sit with each day in meditation.
Stay tuned for the list of possible TRANSLATABLE SKILLS WORKSHOPS.
