Vince’s Daily Journal – Day 14
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*Success*
The primary focus of this program is to help us be successful once we are released, by building new skill sets that will make us more ready to interact with society in positive, constructive ways; to build connections with people and organizations that will open positive opportunities in the future; and to show the outside world the hard worked and commitment to change that many of us put in every day to achieve those goals. That’s a blessing and gift that I wish more people would take up. However, I do want to challenge those in this program, and especially those leading us from the outside, to see that the focus cannot only be on ‘success upon release’. As important as that is, for some of us that’s years, even decades away. For some, there is no out date currently. I believe that this program can help a person not only prepare for future success in the world, but it can change the way we view our lives on the inside, and can show a life lived partially or entirely behind bars is as valuable as one lived in the world. The more stories that are memorialized – especially of those who have distant or non-existent release dates, who have charges that marginalize them even within the justice-impacted community, or who come from extremely disadvantaged communities – the more the world will see AIC’s as human beings, the more they’ll see that we ALL have something incredible and unique to offer the world. I would love to see this program lean a little more into the idea that we don’t have to wait until release to be successful, and I’d really love to see them promote varying ideals of success. I know what Mr. Santos’ vision of success is presented as: enough money in the back to be able to do what I want; the revenue streams to keep my account growing at every moment; social respectability and positive notoriety; notable achievements and accolades; remaining a law abiding, free full citizen of this country; expungement/clemency. I agree with most of these points, but I’m also somewhat dismayed by the intense focus on ‘getting rich’, even if it’s not worded quite so bluntly. Frankly, I’m profoundly disappointed that, in a community that in most cases got themselves in trouble chasing the Almighty Buck, there’s still such a strong inclination to define someone’s success by their bank account, to think that their wealth is in any way a reflection of who they are. The largest series in these newsletters (since I started receiving them at least) Is on stocks/crypto. These are great options for some people, and I do recognize that financial solubility goes a long way towards allowing one to achieve other goals and dreams. But there’s a difference between making sure you have enough, and obsessing about always growing your account to the greatest degree possible. And there are many, including Megan and I, who would define success very differently. So, I guess at this point it’s only fair to define success for myself:
– Successfully complete my sentence, as soon as possible
~ Complete RDAP
~ Strengthen my current relationships and develop new ones with positive, goal-oriented people
~ Apply for Compassionate Relief, based on my judge’s statement that if he could give me less time he would, and the intensely hard work I’ve done to turn my life around and make it meaningful post-addiction, one to two years after beginning daily posts here
~ Successfully complete supervised release, early if possible, at the discretion of my supervising officer
– Establish the life Megan and I want to live
~ Have the first draft of my first novel complete by April 29, 2025
~ Marry as soon as we have the opportunity, while staying true to the laws of the Church
~ Continue my writing career with at least one manuscript every 24 months
~ Find and purchase a piece of land (hopefully with the proceeds of book sales between now and my release) where we can develop a self-sustaining homestead on which we can produce the majority of what we need, and sell/trade our excess for what we can’t produce ourselves
~ Volunteer within the community, especially with animals, the Church, and the justice-impacted, both to develop positive relationships and dispel worries based on our pasts, and to give back
~ Advocate for those in similar situations who may not be able to do so for themselves
~ Earn clemency /expungement so that I can live my life free of the restrictions and ghosts of the mistakes of my past
Going forward, I will be trying to hew a little closer to the way this program is pushing me to work, by doing book reports, iterative plans for the future, responding to critical thinking questions and such, because lately it seems like they’re trying to steer me in that direction and away from what I’ve been doing so far. I’ve never gotten any of the published material this company puts our, so I’m flying by the seat of my pants here a bit, but I want to both work within the bounds of their program (I don’t want to get shut off for not doing what they want), as well as showcase a different possibility of what success can look like, and how it can start TODAY, not something you need to wait for release to experience. I will still be posting about my thoughts and opinions from time to time, but it seems that’s not what this group is looking for from me at this point, and since it’s their program, I’ll do my best to adhere to their template going forward
