The sun was out , It was a pretty day. I was standing at the window finishing applying my make up when I saw happy women , laughing , playing games and dancing to loud music . I haven’t seen these women so united and happy in long time . I see cameras taking pictures , I see carnival booths and people jumping from one to another . My smile grew bigger and I joined them outside . I felt like a happy kid again , remembering the good days with my family at the amusement parks eating cotton Candy and the days at the beach . I came back to the present moment and started to sing to the music . I drank a fresh lemonade and mingled with my peers. I even played a few games . For a second I forgot I was still in prison .
I am at FSL Danbury . The prison yard doesn’t look like a common prison yard. I am in a program facility that believes in rehabilitation. Everything is green , we have picnic tables , all around is nature , all you can see is trees , the flowers and some wild animals. It’s healing to see all this green . It’s a low security facility and its holds 150 of us in an open dorm . We are programming Monday through Friday and working on Trauma related issues and substance use . I have never used drugs. I have never seen drugs before prison. I was never around any one that was a criminal or a drug user , yet here I am surrounded by everything that unfamiliar . It is my first time ever in trouble with the law . This program showing us and working with us on learning what brought us to prison . The program called FIT . Today event called FIT for the summer . We create a carnival . We all worked together to create this amazing day. I am surrounded with some of the most creative , talented and smart people that I have ever met . These women came together and created games , decoration and smart stations . These women and my self included , worked all together and made things that I would never even think were possible . We are the proof that when life gives you lemons you better make lemonade . We definitely made some. I did learn in prison that when you have a will you have a way . I learned so much about myself in here . I learned to believe in my self more , I learned to practice gratitude more and be humble. I am still working on myself daily by working on my thinking errors , my attitudes , my communication style , my action and the consequences of lack of taking actions . I learned another language and I keep increasing my vocabulary . Every day I am learning a new word and writing how they apply to my growth and healing . I am a stronger woman thanks to that . I am working on my future and it is bright ! bright like this day . Even though I forgot I am in prison for a second , it has showed me that we are free , even in prison , free to think , free to educate ourselves , free to focus on the future and overcome the past. I choose to plan my future instead of feeling sorry for myself by being stuck in the past .All I can do is make changes in my life because I can’t change the past , but learn from it and prepare for the future by setting goals and working on accomplishing them.
