Theme: Understanding the Power of Mitigation and Taking Responsibility
Yesterday, I met with a retired attorney who offered to speak with me about my case and what lies ahead. It wasn’t just a legal discussion. It was a moment of mentorship that I was looking forward to.
He told me about a former law partner who made a series of financial missteps. That man ended up in federal prison. But what struck me most wasn’t the sentence he received — it was what happened after. Mr. Emerson said his partner never regained his law license. Not because the law barred him, but because he never fully took responsibility. He then said the man had passed away 2 years ago and I could see the pain in his eyes and on his face. His associate couldn’t admit — even to himself — that what he did was wrong. That lack of accountability followed him forever.
That story was for me as the older attorney was explained to me that negotiation and mitigation are important but also taking responsibility and recognizing what you’ve done and make a lifetime of putting it in the past.
I’ve spent so much time trying to explain or defend what happened — to the point that maybe I haven’t spent enough time owning it. Mr. Emerson made me realize something: mitigation isn’t about saying what the government wants to hear — it’s about being honest with myself.
Yes, I was under pressure. Yes, there were confusing rules, people who mishandled paperwork, and decisions I didn’t fully understand. But at the end of the day, I was the one in charge. I should have slowed down. I should have asked more questions. I should have made sure everything was right before signing or submitting anything. That’s my responsibility. Not VIP Capital’s. Not the government’s. Mine. My life was out of control at the time and it’s no one’s fault but mine. I’ve always held this in principal and thought it was me to take responsibility for myself, but this event is helped me realize that I have to put it in action even in the worst times of my life. Sometimes we make excuses for ourself when the truth is we’re responsible.
I have always respected the advice or attempted to of older men and look for it. I was not disappointed at all in this meeting again to get this metaphor to help me understand where I’m at.
This meeting didn’t give me legal strategy. It gave me something deeper: a reminder to face my wrongs and commit to growth. This is the kind of mentorship always want around me.
