As you probably figured out on your own, my last journal entry wasn’t too uplifting or encouraging. I’m sure you read into my entry about my frustrations about being in prison. Being in prison is frustrating, in fact not only is it frustrating but it is depressing as well. How Michael Santos kept his wits about himself and his spirit(s) up must have taken tremendous discipline and hard work. Sometimes, I struggle just to get out of the hard steel bunk I lay in day or night.
However, today was a different day and I had to participate in it. The CO (correctional officer) pounded on my locker at 545am shined a flashlight in my eyes, abruptly and harshly asked what was my name then told me to grab a laundry bag and report to R&D promptly for a move. I had no idea what any of this meant and quickly had to learn that I was being transported to the compound hospital. I quickly got dressed and headed to R&D (Receiving & Discharge) where again I was abruptly met by other CO’s who told me to strip out and put on these other clothes they gave me. Then they shackled my hands, feet, and belly and had me sit in a holding cell for upwards of an hour while other inmates went through the same O’Keefe. I thought I was going to the hospital to have my hip checked out which was replaced several years ago and has been bothering me significantly. To myself, I thought great some progress toward dealing with the pain I’ve been confronted with for a while now. However, this was not the case at all. I was there for something totally irrelevant to the hip. They did an ultrasound on me to check for an aneurysm. No aneurysms but no x-ray on the hip either. Spent well into the afternoon hours there waiting to be transported back.
Santos advocates staying productive, positive, and disciplined. So I will start doing that. I will quit complaining, though hard sometimes when faced with some of the things we inmates are faced with on a daily basis.
On a positive note, I also found out yesterday 8/16/2023 that Psychology has accepted me for the RDAP program. I had been self-advocating for entry to the program since my arrival at the prison. RDAP is a 9-month Residential Alcohol and Drug Program which from everything I have heard is a very progressive and thorough rehabilitative program. Exactly what I need. In that, this is the main reason I am in prison in the first place. If successful in the program (I will be) I may even earn some time off on my sentence. But that doesn’t matter as much to me as finally arresting a long-overdue drug and alcohol habit. The only drawback I’m faced with is that the prison I am in does not have the RDAP program and I will need to be transferred to one that does. The uncertainty of when that will happen and where will I end up is a bit anxiety-ridden, but as my family, friends and Michael Santos repeatedly advise, “Keep your chin up and keep moving forward”.