The first line of the Serenity Prayer asks us to be granted the serenity to accept the things we
cannot change. I was put to that challenge this holiday weekend.
It all started at 6:45pm on Friday evening. I was in the chapel, just finishing Sabbath services
and we were preparing to watch a movie. The chaplain entered and informed us there would be
no 7pm move back to our units as there was a medical issue in Upper West, which was my unit. I
had planned to watch the movie until 8pm, when the mandatory last move back to our units was
called. I was a bit worried about my elderly cellmate, hoping it wasn’t him.
I returned to my unit at 8pm and the officer was directing everyone back to their cells. No TV, no
phones, no computers. It turns out, the “medical issue” was in fact, that someone was beaten up
badly – apparently someone didn’t pay someone else for drugs in a timely fashion. Because there
is zero tolerance for any violence here, our entire unit would be placed on lockdown for the
entire holiday weekend while the incident was investigated. There were many fun events
planned and we would be unable to go enjoy, while the rest of the inmates in the other units
could. I was disappointed, but have come to expect these “surprises”. Besides, I had a special
visitor coming on Sunday; Sandy, my husband. Then, an inmate said he heard that our unit
would not be allowed visitors.
The minute I heard that, I went into a panic. I had no way of letting Sandy know what was goin
on. I could handle the unfairness of being punished for the actions of another in my unit, but it
was unfair to punish Sandy by having him fly out here, rent a hotel and car, and then being
turned away. I was completely helpless. I would have no way to contact him prior to his visit on
Sunday morning to see if he could cancel and mitigate any financial damage.
I laid awake Friday night, reciting the Serenity Prayer, over and over again until I fell asleep with
sheer exhaustion. On Saturday morning, our unit was called early to breakfast. We were to eat
and immediately return to be locked down. Only when our unit was finished eating then the rest
of the inmates could eat. We weren’t even allowed contact with any other inmates not in our
unit!
At 7:30am, overhead pages were begun for inmates with visitors to begin to report to the
visitation room. Inmates with visitors were announced for every unit but mine. At around 8am
one of the inmates from my unit was overhead paged as he had a visitor. Lo and behold, the
officer came to escort him over to the visitation room. I would be able to have visitors, it seemed,
after all!
Sunday came and promptly at 7:30am I was overhead paged. The security officer came to get me
and escorted me over to the visiting room.
I had a wonderful visit with Sandy – the hours just flew by. At the end of the visit I was escorted
back to my unit. On the way back, the officer informed me that the investigation was completed,
the perpetrators found and locked up, and that after dinner our unit would come off lockdown.
Today, Monday, I was finally able to enjoy the holiday festivities – and most importantly, get
some fresh air. It was a beautiful day. I played Bingo, but unlike the Bingo on President’s Day
weekend, I didn’t win.
As the holiday weekend is now coming to a close this evening and as I reflect back on it, I’m
really thankful that I was able to visit with Sandy. I really don’t care about the holiday festivities
and the special meal. They really, in the scheme of things, mean nothing. But visiting with loved
ones and keeping that connection is so critically important. It truly would have been a loss, a
tremendous loss, for not only me, but for Sandy had the visit not been allowed to happen.
What initially looked to be a sad and boring holiday weekend, turned out to be one of the best I
could ever have imagined.
