I came across this today. I had written it back in April and shared with the probation officer doing my pre-sentence interview and writing the pre-sentence report. It’s a bit rambling, but the sentiments are strong…
I am ashamed of my conduct. I should have known better, I do know better, and I will spend the rest of my life making amends, making restitution whole, and repairing relationships with those that matter the most to me.
This is not a true indication of who I am or who I want to be. However, I went down a bad path and made bad choices. I caused harm to the government, and I hurt others. My parents raised me to be honorable and successful. And although my dad died soon before my indictment, I failed both of them, not to mention my own kids, and myself.
Financially I am destroyed. My career is in shambles, and I am likely to lose my medical license. My wife divorced me, my four kids won’t speak to me, and I am praying to avoid extended prison time. This is so far from what I envisioned and dreamed for my life. It’s an embarrassment for me, and for my kids and my family.
I have an overwhelming sense of remorse for my actions, and I deeply regret my choices that led me here. I take full responsibility for my actions, and I am profoundly sorry for betraying the trust of those that believed in me, and for my actions that deviated from what I know is right.
I understand the gravity of my mistakes, and I have used this to learn and grow and change. I have spent time reflecting on the harm I caused, and I’m determined to make amends and help others avoid the same actions.
I am committed to use this to become a better person. I know that remorse alone is not enough, and I must back up my apologies with actions that promote healing and growth. I know I cannot undo the past, but I promise to spend the rest of my life making a positive impact on others.
My remorse is not an act nor a ploy, it comes from a place of sincere understanding of the gravity of my actions. I am committed to making restitution to the best of my ability, even if it takes my lifetime to do so. I’m embracing restitution as a moral obligation, not just a legal or financial obligation. However, I honestly hope my children do not have to further suffer the consequences of my failures.
I have reflected deeply on what I did, and I have no illusions about the magnitude of my actions. I am burdened by the pain I caused and the mistakes I made. I take full responsibility for my actions, and I know there is no excuse for what I did.
I have learned the hard way that my actions have severe and lasting consequences for myself and many others. I can’t change the past, but I promise to dedicate myself to becoming a better person and making amends. Redemption is a lifelong commitment to me.
I’m committed to seeking help and healing and growing as a person. This includes addressing my drinking problem and how it affected my actions and decisions and relationships.
I promise to honor the trust that society places on me, if given a chance at rehabilitation and redemption. I will do everything within my power to be a positive force in the lives of others and to make meaningful contributions to society.
I know that the road to redemption is long and difficult, but I’m willing to walk it with humility and perseverance. I will carry the weight of my actions for the rest of my life, and I will use that as a force for positive change.
I am very sorry for all of my decisions and actions.
