From the ages of 36-39 I was lost in a world of my own making, of which I am lucky to have made it out alive. In three short years not only did I lose myself, but I lost everything including my family. At the age of 39 I was saved with a Federal Indictment. At 41 I pled guilty to conspiracy to commit money laundering and received a 168 month sentence.
When I began my incarceration I was incapable of understanding or unwilling to understand the gravity of my situation. One hundred and sixty eight months seemed so far away, so unattainable. All I wanted was to make it through. I had alienated everyone except my mother and had become someone I was terribly ashamed to be. Slowly, over time, I began to remember who I was. I reached out and began counseling, studying scripture, and investing in myself again. I called family who I hadn’t spoken to in years and reconnected.
I became a tutor in the GED program which allowed me to help others attain the education needed to change their lives. I also taught an algebra adult education class. I then applied for, and was chosen to become one of twelve women who began a new program training service dogs. I trained new hires and taught classes daily for this program. I developed the confidence I needed and a sense of pride in what I was accomplishing. I completed my DOL animal training apprenticeship.
Years later I came across Mr. Santos’ book “Earning Freedom.” It inspired me to work hard at becoming the person I was meant to be. I realized the difficulties I would face upon my release, but also the many opportunities I would have to reach success. Where once I was only coasting along, I started to feel like I was in the drivers seat with a destination of success in sight. I identified the plan I needed to succeed which included my biography and release plan. My next step was to find a way to share this with other women.
Being in custody for seven years has given me the opportunity to meet and get to know women from many different cultures and backgrounds. I found that the one thing we have in common is our apprehension about our future release. While there are certainly women who have a loving family and stable home to return to, there is also a large community of women who do not. Without the proper tools they are in danger of returning to the same places and situations that brought them here. Many leave with the best of intentions, only to return.
Knowing this I developed a plan to create a position and a location where these resources and information would be readily accessible. I then approached Unit Team and the Re-Entry Coordinator with a formal proposal and presentation. With persistence I was able to push through the challenges and have now been assigned the title of “Career Resource Clerk.”
I am well on my way to making a difference, not only in my life but in the lives of other women.
With the goal of offering a re-entry class and facilitating an information session on Prison Professors Talent (PPT), I gathered information about the website and Mr. Santos’ accredited FSA class, “Preparing for Success After Prison.” I then aided in obtaining a donation of needed workbooks for the class. I found a staff member to facilitate and am now assisting in planning the class. I have also been given the consent to have an informative session, helping women build their profiles for PPT. My hope is to eventually schedule a speaking engagement with Mr. Santos.
While I do not have many years of custody left, I still have a few. I intend to use them defining myself as the successful, rehabilitated women I have become. With this in mind, I have moved forward with the confidence needed to pursue the things I want in life. This season of my life has served me well. I am no longer the individual I had become in those three short years. I am determined to win the trust of my children and show them that through determination and perseverance you can overcome even the greatest obstacles.
