Working in Psychology has been a big blessing for me. Prior to that, I held the job in Unicorp. Industries, a BOP program, as a Quality Assurance Manager for the last 3 years. The factory makes the Molle 4000 ruck sack for the Military, Tarps, and Mattresses. I inspected the Molle 4000 pack. But unexpectedly, 85% of the factory was laid off due to a reduction in the contracts output of 4500 bags per month to 500 or so. Thankfully, I had been in training to become a Peer Specialist and it has been very rewarding. I cofacilitate with a Drug Treatment Specialist employed by Psychology services working closely with him teaching recovery victims about Drug Education. Interacting with the Adults in custody who have drug related issues has been very eye opening and inspiring. I wrote a piece called “Appropriator,” based on principles I learned in the Challenge program. The two principles I chose, Power Orientation and Sentimentality, are “Criminal Thinking errors.”
Power Orientation is people focused on trying to gain control over others and the world around them. They may use this power to dominate other directly or indirectly by getting others attention and achieving their desired outcome regardless of the impact it has on anyone.
Sentimentality is excusing the harm that a person commits’ towards others by saying and doing things in effort to make them feel better about themselves or to make themselves look good to other people. It a was to compartmentalize and avoid less favorable parts of themselves by focusing on the positive aspect of their character.
APPROPRIATOR
I stand on the sidewalk
watching…
like I am untouchable, like it isn’t my fault
the destitute walking around like zombies
All day living their lives ‘bent’
standing in line, single file, at the Trap house
like they are waiting to be issued Government–
cheese,
that I receive, from these fiends
while with every single puff, their dreams slowly recede
I watch as they the indulge in the hard white,
an escalation from weed
Crack pipe popping; like Redenbacher
I live a nightlife filled with promiscuous women and Vodka
I’m searching the bottle
for emotionally impunity
Desperately trying to drown out my feelings
all day, while continually destroying my community
I truly believe that I’m their savior
I loan out “cheese”(money)
to financially appease, the greed of desperate female neighbors in need
who are simply trying to nurture their seeds
And yet what they do not know, is that it’s really quid pro quo
My trunk popped, passing toys out to young girls and boys
like I’m Nino
Handing out turkeys and school supplies
under a guise, all while feeding their soul lies
But hey, I have them thinking I’m a hero
when really my heart is colder than Sub zero’s
Because everyday is Mortal Kombat
A continuous struggle and hustle
And to be honest, I’m a disease worse than Covid
I turn innocent victims into the Walking dead
And the funny thing is, I know it, but my pride let me won’t show it
I care not, unless someone is wanting my spot
and begin peddling their rock, infiltrating my block
I react, attack, and now I’m looking up from my back
My mother, cradling me in her arms
screaming, covered in my blood from where I’ve been shot
But who can I blame, certainly not the rain
My choices alone are the vehicle of my personal pain
And my how the mighty shall fall…
especially when you are the appropriator of them all–
