I have actually been on both sides of “The doing time” fence. I found myself in prison for the very first time at the very young age of 19. Unfortunately, most of the time I found myself in prison it was behind someone else leading the way. Like I said, I was young, very easily given to influence and I had the “Ride or Die” mentality. I was running with the older crowd and I did not give one bit of thought for my future. I was in the game, where there is never a winner. Only a loser. I just wasn’t wise enough to realize that “I” was the loser. It was so easy to get caught up in it at a young age but such a challenge to finally overcome. This is technically my 5th time in prison and I can reflect on it now and see the gradual (very slow!!!) progress that I made. I think the studies are correct for the most part because my change came with age…and wisdom. The first few times I found myself in prison, I blocked the world out with NO thought to life or my future. By the 3rd time, I believe I had kids and it started to affect me somewhat differently. I began to think about actually getting out and being good. I believe that’s called the contemplation stage of change, maybe the precontemplation stage. But regardless, the process of going in the right direction began to take place. After my 3rd release, I did get out and do better for about a year. I’m not sure when the wheels fell off but back down the rabbit hole I went for a short while and was back in again for a serve out this time. I learned that setbacks are a part of rehabilitation. So I pulled myself up and was prepared to go out again. I was released and began making plans to get my kids back, had my mind on the right things, but unfortunately was in the wrong place and the Feds had already began an investigation on me from the previous time I was out. I didn’t have a chance, things were already in motion at the time that was out of my control. That resulted in my catching a 240 month federal bid at age 29. Once that happened it really caught me from the left. And yes, a lot of things were “misrepresented” in court but what can I say. It was my past catching up to me. At the beginning, I didn’t care about anything. I’m in prison for 20 years and my life is over. But over the years I have fixed my way of thinking and I have decided that maybe I needed this so that I can be where I am today and who I am today. I don’t believe there is any of the old me left. I have taken the time to be the absolute best version of myself and I’m going to be successful when I get out. I have the mindset, the wisdom, the knowledge, the common sense, and trajectory in life to do just this. I want to be the example for others that it can be done!
READ NEWSLETTER ARTICLE HERE: https://prisonprofessors.com/journal-entries/opportunity-costs-success-and-failure-upon-release/
