Today was a rough day here and I pretty much stayed in my cell all day, I spoke to my son who was out fishing with my mom, KJ said he was enjoying himself like he always did with my mom. Suddenly, my mom said oh hey Kj did you tell your “Dada” what happened today, then my son said in excitement “Oh Dada I thought I saw you today, there was a man who looked like you and I was trying to see but cause he had a hat on but it wasn’t you”.I begin to say oh son you where excited at the thought of seeing me he said yeah but it wasn’t you, I told him not to worry because soon he would see me all the time. When I got off the phone after the allotted 15 minutes before it automatically hangs up even if you couldn’t tell your loved one you love them, I smile thinking hey at least my son was happy at the thought of seeing me then I felt depressed that Kj, even has to go around thinking he sees his father out in the streets when in fact I’m sitting in federal prison. I like to think of myself as a pretty tough guy but after that conversation with my son I went to take a shower and cried while I washed up to hide the tears. After I woke up I begin to plan more on my release plan plotting my strategy upon my release sometimes be my only escape from this hell knowing that I soon would be reunited with my loved ones. I called a good friend of mines whom is a great graphic designer and asked him to create a video illustrating my new purpose of being a gang interventionist and wanted him to capture visually the remarkable change I’ve embraced, turning away from being a problem to being committed to adding to the solution. This is apart of my release plan of being a gang interventionist, so I’m happy that I’m able to be proactive in getting things done to further my goals right now, from here sitting in a cell. Even though I’m physically here in federal prison my mind is always outside in the free world, rather it’s imagining I’m at a museum or park with KJ, or planning my next move to be make my transition back into society easier. Also today I learned my usual 5 words, so everyday for the past 2 years in prison I learn 5 new words its a fun way to teach myself and stay busy doing something productive. Well, this is the end of my writing for today, I’m thankful for this outlet, because it’s therapeutic.
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