9/18/2023 (Day #4282)
Vocabulary and misstated/misspoken references
I’ve been reflecting on my journal entries and my vocabulary. I’m self-conscious about my vocabulary (yes, more vulnerability I’m laying out there). I feel like I have a limited “range” of words. I believe that’s somewhat a consequence of my keeping a small social circle, which means fewer opportunities for interaction and conversation. One of the methods of expanding vocabulary and word usage is practice through conversation with others. I accept the consequences and reduced “practice using my words” in exchange for healthy peers and social contacts that don’t jeopardize what I’m working towards. If a limited vocabulary here is the price of staying on the constructive and productive path, so be it.
That being said, I think I’ve misstated or mischaracterized some of my behavior by using “hostile” or “hostility” instead of “defensive” in some entries. I think hostile is an overstatement. Defensive is a more accurate reflection, especially in the context of my responses and deflection when confronted about my whereabouts, activities, and “old me playbook” jackassery.
I’m aiming for accuracy and clarity here, so please bear with me.
Vulnerability is a strength and an asset, not a weakness or liability.