8/17/2023 (Day #4250)
Motivations and intentions
I’m very mindful about aligning my objectives with my motivations. I strive to ensure that what I do accurately and authentically reflects my profound remorse for the pain and grief I’ve caused by my behavior. I’ve made a habit of putting myself in the shoes of the victims of my behavior, and asking myself, “Is this inconsiderate, disrespectful, or hurtful in any way?”, in order to avoid causing more pain.( I’ve learned since then how that relates to empathy.) I motivate myself with a self-imposed sense of responsibility to become a better me – that doing nothing to change my thinking and behavior would be “salt in the wound” to anyone I’ve hurt.
I understand I can’t control others’ perspectives. I CAN control what I do that feeds perceptions. So I am hyper-vigilant that my motivations are sincere and my intentions are authentic representations of me as I pursue my objectives. I don’t “pad my stats” or “fluff” my work – I seek out opportunities for learning and growth that are true to me and what I’m working towards:
#1: Self-improvement through therapy, treatment, and education.
#2: Established continual growth through repetition and reinforcement of positive and healthy choices and opportunities.
#3: Preliminary decision for Early Release to Home Confinement.
(Why Preliminary? I’d like to complete the programs I’m currently enrolled in, so a preliminary date would accommodate that.)
Accurate and authentic, motivations and intentions, representative of the depth of my remorse and consideration of the pain I’ve caused. Sincerely and truly the “new me”.
Authentically myself, finally.