Once again, I find myself writing after a long delay. This time it was not my fault, we have been locked down for 21 days without phones, computers, or anyway to communicate with anybody other than the mail. I’m finding out that even with the mail (running three to four weeks behind), the many frustrations of prison, especially with the way this prison is ran it makes for a very tough experience. That makes it even more important for a person to persevere through these challenging times. I will not complain or let this place bring me down. I remember that I have choice to be happy and to not let the negative things in this prison or in this world bring me down. So I don’t, which makes me aware that I am on the right track; being stronger and focused on the big prize – my freedom!
Recently, I was reading a book that discussed failure, and the writer Andrew Thorp King discusses how failure is a cleansing process. In a way it purifies a person by releasing failure, and then allowing a person to then achieve what ever they seek. This is an interesting concept, which I would agree with as long as that person can turn that failure into a positive, or at least keeps trying without hurting or harming anything or anyone in the process.
Failure has broke me repeatedly throughout my adult life. And it really broke me when I came into this place. But I have now learned that these experiences appropriately break me so that they would not kill me. Because I did, I became immensely strong at the broken places. So now I thoughtfully allow failure to break me, so when I encounter it, that it not only does not kill me but makes me stronger than ever at those broken places – like a hydra that doubles its strength when it is harmed. I look at my failures as a prepper to learn how to optimize each new failure that breaks me.
This place, and how the staff and even inmates want me to fail, this is the real test of potential failure, but to me it is a challenge that I welcome everyday I wake up!
William Kragthorpe
